I can’t quite tell you why your car is in the front yard, or why you slept with your clothes on, but don’t worry, I’m not gone.
Every single day, the guys from Section 400 will be providing a rundown of everything that happened in the world of sports the night before.
No treats, just tricks
This football season has really been a kick in the taint for good ol’ me. Not only is Auburn’s program in shambles, but my fantasy teams are a combined 3-9, and my New York Giants are an utter disgrace to the franchise.
Yesterday’s loss to the New York Jets was pitiful. The “G-Men” threw the ball 14 times for NEGATIVE EIGHT total yards, running often-injured star running back Saquon Barkely 36 times in the process. He averaged under 4 yards per carry over those 36 rushing attempts.
Somehow despite all that offensive hooblah, the Giants were still a yard away from sneaking out a victory to improve to 3-5 until all halloween hell broke lose.
Graham Gano missed a chip shot field goal on a fourth and 1 that Brian Daboll probably should’ve just gone for. Zach Wilson then engineered a 2-play, 54-yard drive in 27 seconds to send the game into overtime.
The Jets prevailed in the extra frame, and my Sunday was ruined by 4 o’clock once again.
Return of the boogieman
Joe Burrow is officially back.
The Bengals quarterback led his team to another win on Sunday, putting Cincinnati above .500 for the first time in 2023. Burrow was sensational on Sunday, completing 28/32 passes for 282 yards and 3 touchdowns.
As for the team he beat, the 49ers have now lost 3-straight games for the first time in the Brock Purdy era, and they’ll have some major thinking to do as they head into their bye week.
Snakes, and Rangers, and Bats oh my.
The first two games of the 2023 World Series have come and went, with each team picking up a win in Arlington, TX.
The home team won a wild, 12-inning, Game 1 before the road underdog Diamondbacks bite back, capturing a blowout win in Game 2 off the back of an outstanding start from pitcher Merrill Kelly.
Veteran old head Max Scherzer gets the ball for the Rangers tonight as the series shifts to Arizona. He and the electric Rangers lineup will go up against young postseason star Brandon Pfaadt.
Sooner than later
The No. 6 ranked Oklahoma Sooners have gone down. After so many electric wins and close finishes ending their way, Dillon Gabriel and the Sooners couldn’t finish the job against the suddenly good Kansas Jayhawks football program.
Oklahoma’s loss opens up the door for Washington, Oregon, or even Penn State to climb up the rankings and create some further chaos as we approach the College Football Playoff.
It really is a shame the field is not expanded this year, as we talked in last week’s podcast about how much parity we’ve had this season.
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